Hoohee, Doobie, and Loogie
Hoohee, Doobie, and Loogie, sometimes called "The 3 Crackheads," are community organizers. For a fee of $100 each per day, they perform various services critical to the Progressive cause.
Their specialty is masquerading as conservative
activists in order to embarrass the conservative movement -- for
example, by posing as Tea Party protesters and making extremist
comments. (They neither endorse nor understand the views they
are instructed to express.) Hoohee wore, to a Tea Party
protest, a shirt declaring "Hate is Cool," and he wore a "White is
Right" shirt to a Town Hall protest. Doobie's assignment at
the events was to tell reporters of his admiration for Hitler.
Loogie carried a Confederate flag to the Tea Party event and a "flag
with this crooked thang" (a swastika) to the Town Hall.
When "Scalawag Sid" LaPore, a lobbyist and top Democratic fundraiser, sought to replace the Washington Redskins with a professional football team, he instructed Hoohee, Doobie, and Loogie to pose as American Indians and protest the Redskins' allegedly racist name. As usual, though, they misunderstood their instructions; Loogie brought with him an "Injun" flag from India.
In support of KERNEL, the President's former
organization, they collect names off tombstones, off lists of famous
Americans, off lists of diseases, and off lists of Latin phrases,
and they get those names added them to the voter rolls.
Although they are sometimes called The 3 Crackheads, Hoohee, Doobie, and Loogie do not spend all of their money on crack. They also enjoy ice cream.
The fellows might, on occasion, foul up their assignments, but they are among the leading lights of the community organizing profession. What does the future hold for The 3 Crackheads? Only future episodes of "The Gentleman from Lickskillet" will tell. (If you'd like to see future episodes, be sure to sign the petition here.)